Carlo Rossi - Sangria @@@@@ (5 corks)

Retails: $9.99 per jug (Total Wine)

Nothing screams "I'm cheap" like Carlos Rossi. No offense to the rather rotund man on the label but I'm somewhat embarrassed to say that I absolutely love his Sangria. However, when one submits his or herself to jug wine, there are a few rules to be followed before "gettin' jugg-y with it" (y'ouch):

1) DRINK THIS SANGRIA ICE COLD. It's jugg-y-ness is only amplified when warm so do yourself a favor and stick it in the fridge and be sure to put some ice in your cup.

2) Given that it is, after all, JUG WINE, it's perfect for serving at a party due to volume. Just pour into a pretty pitcher and pour into some fun cups and no body will know it came from a jug. Or you can keep it classy like I did with plastic bright red solo cups a.k.a. chalises of kegdom.

3) Add fruit. Slice up some oranges, apples, limes, whatever. It takes five minutes and it really makes it taste as if its homemade.

I celebrated my birthday poolside last weekend with a few friends and successfully served up some Carlo Rossi Sangria with fruit in a pitcher and all I received were compliments. Fools. Mwahahaahahha.